CHEROKEE HAIR TAMPONS

"'Cherokee Hair Tampons'" is episode 54 of the Comedy Central series ''South Park''. It originally aired on June 28, 2000.

Contents

Plot synopsis

Kenny's Death

Trivia

Plot synopsis

The episode begins with a substitute teacher coming in to teach the 3rd grade class. The boys mess around with the teacher, with Stan pretending that he's Cartman, Kenny pretending he's Stan, and Cartman pretending he's Kenny. Cartman laughs so hard after this that he squirts milk out of his nose when he laughs too hard, even when he isn't drinking any. The teacher gives them all an assignment to make a card for Kyle who is sick, and Butters literally ends up being the card. Stan visits his sick friend, and Mrs. Marsh suggests to Mrs. Broflovski that she try New Age healing to cure Kyle. They go to the store of Miss Information, the new mystical woman in town, who tells them that mysterious "toxins" are the cause of Kyle's ailments and prescribes a series of herbs to help him; they in fact make his condition worse but she convinces the people of South Park that they are healing him even though it is not visible, and so the whole town becomes enamoured with her remedies and buys such nostrums as "Cherokee hair tampons" from two supposed Native Americans (played by guest stars Cheech and Chong. As revealed later, they look Mexican, as they resemble Cheech and Chong) who share her store. Meanwhile, Mr. Garrison is fired for charges of soliciting sex from a minor (Cartman). He decides to fulfill his dream of publishing a book, and begins to write a romance novel, in which he manages to use the word "penis" 6,083 times.

Stan goes to ask Dr. Doctor for help, and the doctor says that Kyle will die unless he gets a kidney transplant from the only other person in town with a compatible blood type, Cartman. Stan tries to convince everyone that this so-called "healing" is not working, but Miss Information insists that Doctor only wants money unlike her remedies which are all about nature (despite the fact she charges at least $100 per item) Stan tries to convince Cartman to donate his organ, but he hates Kyle and so refuses to do it unless given $10,000,000. An attempt to sneak into his house and cut his kidney out while he sleeps proves fruitless, as he wears a "Kidney Blocker 2000". Mrs. Broflovski brings in Kyle for a "spiritual healing" by the "Native Americans", who declare that he needs to see a doctor desperately and also say that Miss Information is a total fraud, and they are really Mexican. According to Miss Information, nobody would buy medicine from Mexicans, which is why she lied in the first place, much to everyone's horror (especially the women who bought the Cherokee Hair Tampons). The people in town beat her to death, and Stan declares he has a plan to get Kyle his kidney.
Cartman awakens the next day to find the Kidney Blocker 2000 destroyed, and redness all over his bed. He marches to Stan's house and recovers his kidney, then goes to the doctor and arranges to have it put back in, signing a release form. However, all this is a part of Stan's plan. Cartman's mom really opened the Blocker and they put ketchup in his bed to fool him; the form he signed actually allowed Kyle to take his kidney. Cartman is angered (it isn't revealed where the kidney Stan gave Cartman came from. It was probably fake). Kyle is better, and Mr. Garrison comes to give him a copy of his book, ''Valley of the Penises'', which was published mainly because women read romance novels and, according to Mr. Garrison, want to read about penises. Cartman is still angry, but as Kyle and Stan laugh at him, milk comes out of Kyle's nose. Cartman expresses relief that Kyle got his "crappy kidney," so he no longer has to put up with milk coming out of his nose.

Kenny's Death

He is crushed by a piano as he is walking away from Stan, who has just offended him by his crying over Kyle's impending death (most likely because nobody cares about the death of Kenny.)

Trivia

★ In the Comedy Central promos for this episode, Cartman says that he plans on making Britney Spears his love slave with the ten million he gets for Kyle's kidney. In the actual episode, Cartman says that what he intends to do with the money isn't an issue (because all that matters is that Stan gets the money before Kyle dies).

★ When Cartman refuses to donate a kidney to Kyle, he sings "no" to the tune of "Comedy Tonight" from A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum.

★ Right before Kenny dies he says a few lines to Stan in anger. Though the lines are muffled as always they can be made out to be "You don't seem to care when ''I'' Die" and a variation of Cartman's line "Thats it I have had enough of this bullshit! Screw you! I'm going home!" He also does the hand gestures Cartman does and walks away to his death while Stan just cries over Kyle, putting some truth into his first line.